I'm not like the other "boutique" pages and I was beating myself up over it.
"ugh...I should have better photos"
"ugh...don't post that, it's too personal"
"I should do my hair & makeup before I hop on there"
"Change my business idea AGAIN?"
"Can people see through me? See that I'm winging it?"
Blah. Blah. Blah.
Honestly, these thoughts were holding me back. BIG TIME!
Always worrying if the post was perfect. Fixing my captions a 100 times. Will this offend anyone? Am I being TOO much? Not enough? FUCK. It was draining the life out of me.
All I want to do is show up. That's it. Just be me and be real. I don't want to show up as someone I'm not.
I don't curl my hair, it's usually in a messy top knot. OR during the winter months, it's in a toque. I don't do full make up. I can't stand the feeling of "heaviness" on my face. I no longer get my nails done and I can't remember the last time I saw my eyebrow girl (these puppies be BAD haha) My weight has fluctuated while being home with the kids. And I'm not always comfortable in my clothes. I haven't figured out the best time to post. And most important...I'm taking this way to seriously. I'm GOOFY! Humor is my LANGUAGE! I felt like if I showed that part of myself on my "professional" page it would take away my credibility.
SO I wrote a journal entry and I wanted to share, because I think a lot of us get caught up with the pressures of social media, even if we don't think we do.
"Dear Authentic Self,
I promise to hand over the reigns, I trust you. You're guided by my intuition and I KNOW you won't steer me wrong. I promise to let you shine through in all my actions and I promise to have your back when we fall short. I will embrace all that you bring to the table. Your messy hair. Banged up nails, and bushy eyebrows. I will hit "share" when you want to post ridiculous things that make you laugh. I will get quiet and listen. I will help push through the boundaries I've set upon you. I'll break them down and rebuild. Until we are one. Until it is natural for me to show up as me."
Fuck the other pages.
Fuck what everyone else is doing or might think.
You're NOT them and that's what's awesome. So showcase that!
You don't need to have all the answers.
AND you can show up as your messy ass self and still feel good. Give yourself the permission to be your most authentic self.
xx